So many things going on around me. So many hurting people. I am hurting as well. I feel like I am surrounded by affliction and suffering and pain… here in my city. I wish it was different. I wish I was different. I wish I had the power to change things and situations. As I write this I am anguishing over the embarrassment I feel for writing through tears in such a public place.
Thoughts run through my mind. Things like “you shouldn’t be here” or “don’t let anyone see your face” or “nobody cares”. Those statements hurt. Each one like a dagger. Piercing. Me.
I think that is why I like music and art so much… it’s why I like to read or watch a good movie. I want to escape into the something that will transport me away from all of the pain into a quiet and comfortable pillow of safety.
But this is false. These feelings are the feelings every single one of us goes through on this journey of life. We all hurt. We all feel sad. We all carry some kind of pain in some kind of way. That is why I know your pain and you know mine. We feel those deep “cuts” that tear into our soul and then cry out “Why God?!!!!” “Why me?!!” …..
It is in those deepest moments of pain and anguish… when I am despairing… that I remember Jesus on the cross.
Then I remember my God knows my pain… and then some.
As I searched for an answer for these feelings I came across Psalm 40…. Go read it and come back.
This Psalm is a reminder that our God knows exactly where we are coming from. He’s dealt with us and people like us since the dawn of humanity. He understands human emotion and the pain and anguish we will or have experienced.
In these moments I’m thankful that my God came down from Heaven and suffered… that is crazy to say but… it’s true. I’m so very thankful that there is someone bigger than me, smarter than me and wise enough to lead me out of my despairing.
I wish Jesus didn’t have to suffer and at the same time… am glad He knows my pain… and more.
I hope that doesn’t sound too twisted but…I mean He is God and I worship a God that is greater than anything I can ever imagine. The power of Jesus is displayed in His willingness to suffer at the hands of His creation so that He may demonstrate His power over life and death.
Those who are with Him are and will always be defended. They will be protected. They are children of the King. No one can come against them.