For some reason there are times I feel like I find myself needing to hit the reset button on my relationship with God. Do you ever feel like that? In the past I’d handle this need for “reset” by reading a good book or taking some time off and getting some good ‘ol rest in. When things have gotten really bad I would look for a good retreat and get a way for a bit to recharge my batteries. In fact in the past I’d look for a good house I could stay at for a weekend and maybe sneak a way for a day or two at the max.
Lately I’m feeling like I need something more. I can’t tell you I fully understand why I need this kind of reset. I just know it’s time to reinvent my relationship with God. My desire for deeper connection and dependence with God is growing, therefore my relationship with God needs to grow as well.
When I say “relationship with God” I’m talking about the rhythm of my spiritual life that I am accustomed to. Similar to the rhythm of life you live as you wake up everyday, get ready for work interact with family, friends and make time for meaningful relationships.
The rhythm of your life seems manageable leaving you the ability to interact with people, make time for fun events and backyard barbecues. When you are in this kind of rhythm of life things just seem to roll along and life is good. Then something, somehow, sometime gets introduced that causes the rhythm to beat erratically or maybe you miss beats.
At any rate things just aren’t the same and you start to feel like you’re struggling in your rhythm… that’s because you are. It’s the same with your relationship with God. Maybe you used to have a quiet time every day at a certain time or maybe you enjoyed singing at church or listening to messages but for whatever reason things aren’t getting you to that place where you feel you are in a deep relationship with God anymore.
There is a lot to say on this topic of resetting. My purpose in scratching the surface is to introduce the topic for those who are ready to go on the journey of reestablishing a deep and meaningful walk with God. Here are some steps to consider to begin to reset:
First: Talk to God.
There are a few fundamental things required to effect change in any relationship you have in life. Two specific things are 1) communication and 2) transparency. Like any realtioship you continue to invest in the level of transparency and communication must change when the intimacy level rises. Interestingly it is our desire for growth and depth with God that necessitates our need to be more open with God, more honest with Him. To do this we must spend tiem talking to him and practicing this new kind of language. You can liken this to the relationship between a parent and their children. When the child is a baby it doesn’t need much more than hugs and food. As the child grows and desires to know it’s parent and vice versa, both the parent and the child must find a new way to talk to each other so they can experience the beauty and depth of close relationship.
Second: Make an appointment.
If you have ever been on a date with someone you’ll notice that you had get a “date” on the calendar. You set a time and you had expectations to share a bit of yourself. The point is that spending time with someone you care deeply for is not just “good”, it’s necessary. If you don’t’ take the time to sit in the presence of the other involved with your relationship you end up “neglecting” the one you love. Setting an appointment with God helps to ensure you are not neglecting your relationship with God. Start by setting a weekly time or monthly time where you can just be. When I’ve done this in the past I’ve ended up falling asleep…. That is what happens when we go to long outside of the presence with God. We end up needing rest so God allows us to get rest. Once the rest is done, it’s time to. Speak without talking. Learn to quiet your mind long enough to hear the subtle nudging of God in your life.
Third: Get help.
100% of the time all of us need someone to find someone to help us grow in our relationship with anyone. This is simply because we need others to help us understand these new places of depth and commitment. In business this looks like a business mentor, in relationships or on your own this looks like a therapist. In your spiritual life this looks mainly like a mentor, disciple or spiritual director. These people are skilled in the way of knowing and listening to God so much they can help you learn how to listen to God like they do. You can get a book and read it… but if you have the opportunity to spend time with someone you knows God intimately you would be blown away to see how they can help you develop the skills necessary to hear and talk to God.
There are more you can do, but it is good to start simply and to go slow. I like to go to the beach or go to the woods and sit and take in the beauty of God’s creation. It helps me to experience Him in new ways. When I’m feeling overwhelmed I typically need to find an office space or room in a quiet house where I can allow myself to rest. A huge part of hitting the reset button is giving yourself the grace to start slow and move slow in your relationship with God.
I hope this is helpful for you as you begin your journey. Know the Lord loves you and you only need turn to Him and cry out in humility and he will be there to help you along the way.